Not everything you lose is a loss

I’m sure most of us have suffered the loss of a relationship/friendship that left us questioning what happened. Some people grow apart, and that is okay. But some people are treated badly. In which case there are usually a few ways of handling this; you forget them and go on with your life, get angry and end up wasting a whole lot of your own time hating someone or there are the people who still long for that them in their life, still questioning how someone they held so dearly could hurt them so badly.

If you have to ask yourself whether you’re being treated in the right way, ask if this person is making you truly happy or if this is how you would treat them, then you do not need that person in your life. So if you have lost a friend/boyfriend/girlfriend who made you question their actions that much, then you have not lost something of much value. And trust me, it’s easy to slip into ‘they used to be so nice’ but if they aren’t that way now then that is not the person you lost.

Now I don’t encourage wasting your time hating someone either, I know, easier said than done. But from what I have learnt, hating someone has more of an impact on you than it will ever have on them. Dislike or distance yourself from people that have wronged you, go for it, we won’t like everyone we meet anyway. But really hating someone, investing that much energy into someone you don’t even like just seems like a huge waste of time to me.

My best advice to you is; put yourself first. Cut that tie, focus on yourself, better yourself and most importantly, look after yourself. I saw a tweet yesterday that read; ‘The best revenge is no revenge. Move on. Be happy. Find inner peace. Flourish.’ And I couldn’t agree more! Now I’m not saying cut this person out your life and never speak of or to them again. But don’t waste your time worrying about them, focus on your own life and once you both grow as individuals, then maybe you can come into each other’s lives again. Or maybe you’ll realise it was the right thing for both of you that you grew apart.

Be loving to yourself by not allowing toxic people run your life.

Be happy in your independence.

Surround yourself with people that make you feel loved.

Grow and flourish.

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